that city of trust.

Everyday comes with its own oppurtunities to trust and build trust. With every day that passes free of violation, and betrayal one becomes more and more trusting. And then one is betrayed, or let down, or forgotten and it starts all over. Back from the point where you think you'll never trust again and you'll never find your place. For most those spells don't last long. Soon one is back on his/her feet ready to face it all again and accept people and their sometimes-beautiful, sometimes-cruel imperfections. Ones' own shortcomings brought to light help one to regain trust in others also. One sees that he/she isn't perfect and neither are other people but we all mean well, right? But what if the hurt was constant and what if every moment in your life that meant something special because someone did something kind or put their trust in you turned into a moment when you were mistreated or betrayed? What if there weren't those times for recovery after every heart break? What if each torn heart string led to another being plucked too violently upon? Would every single strand of belief and feeling be broken, violated, and torn? What would happen then? How could one return to a time before such pain wreaked havoc upon you, body and soul? The road to redemption is a bitter place that not all are blessed enough to see the end of. But many do. At the end of that road there is a brilliant white city where nothing bad happens. Nothing bad. In that place, light everlasting will take the place of this present darkness. There no one will harm you and you will no longer have the desire to hurt others. There all will be made new. The forgiven whore will sing a new song of purity and grace and the repentant drug lord will pour himself out at the footstool of the Most High. There, beautiful children-even those born in brothels-if they have been made new, will never fear nor doubt nor hunger again.That city is perfect. That city is full of tearful reunions and heartfelt song. That city is where I am going.

Lydia