My parents paid for a photographer that we know to take my senior pictues a couple weeks ago. She did a great job. This one is my favorite because I love my worn out shoes .

I have an issue with keeping shoes forever. I don't want to let them go, I want to wear them until they disintegrate. Let me tell you why.

1) I don't want to waste. If the shoe fits-why buy another pair?

2) I can be picky about shoes and sometimes have trouble finding replacements that I like.

3) I love love love having shoes that tell my story. I love dirt and grime, and getting all messed up so that I can be cleaned again. I like seeing the threads in my shoes because, to me, that says "you've done something, Lydia. you've been places. you've worked hard." And in the end, that's what I want my life to say.

Walk on, Little Darling.

Your tears run down my shoulder.

It breaks my heart

Over and over.

I hate seeing you like this,

Knowing that it only gets harder.

You didn't know that all the bad in the world is so painful;

Adults do such a good job of hiding it.

It's not fair that no one warned you

It's not fair that that would not have helped.

Your tears fall onto my shoulder

My sweatshirt soaks them up.

I am watching you discover all the things that tore me up.

Not long ago, I was you.

I was the one with the tears in my eyes,

With my heart being split in two by a new,

A cruel feeling.

Death, pain, grief, turmoil,

It all paralyzes you.

Paralyzes your emotions,

Paralyzes your thoughts.

You have to go on.

You have to look up.

I am here for you forever

But I cannot take it all away.

Face the world with a rainbow in your heart.

Walk on, battered but not diminished.

Little darling, life is going to scar you.

It has distressed my body and soul in the same way.

Every one is going to hurt you,

Like Bob warns us,

You just have to decide who is worth it.

You're worth it to me

So tell me what you need to,

Keep hidden what you don't.

I am not looking for a good story.

I don't want to be in the middle of things.

Tell me when you need me

And I will be gone when you don't.

I will let you down

But in your heart you know that He won't.

So walk on, Little Darling.

Walk with your heart in His hands

And thrive.

Sure, we are young.
Yes, there are things we do not know or understand.
Of course life is going to be hard.
That does not give anyone a right to tell us we can't, to say that we must do a certain something.
Our lives are just that: our lives.
We have a right to make our own mistakes.
How will we learn if we never live?
Independence is hard, but it's something we all have a right to pursue.
Why do youcomplain as if life is a punishment?
Why do you act like you had nothing to do with making your life what it is?
I see, I know, I can tell.
Your decisions decide your destiny.
Maybe even your happiness.
Do not try and re-write your story through me.
Stifling us will not give you a second chance.
Only you can do that.

It's time for change; why shouldn't we want it?




Lydia

These are my new coloured pencils! I am so blessed to have the money to buy them for my own use. I'm working on a drawing for my Grandma's Christmas present! Shhhhh

"The Trip was to be an Odyssey in the fullest sense of the word, an epic journey that would change everything. He had spent the four previous years, as he saw it, preparing to fulfill an absurd and onerous duty: to graduate from college. At long last he was unencumbered, emancipated from the stifling world of his parents and peers, a world of abstraction and security and material excess, a world in which he felt grievously cut off from the raw throb of existence. He intended to invent an utterly new life for himself, one in which he would be free to wallow in unfiltered experience." -Into The Wild, by Jon Krakauer.

This quote is speaking of a guy named Chris McCandless (self-named Alex Supertramp), who I have recently added to my list of heroes. After he graduated from college, he took off in his car, and when it died, on foot, just to traipse around. To tramp the continent. He canoed to Mexico! He had great experiences (as well as near-death ones), and lived with nature, as a part of nature. Unfortunately, he died in 1992, but I still think most highly of him. He was tough, peace-loving, and a little out-there, like John the Baptist, Nelson Mandela or Mother Teresa. I like people like that. I hope to be a person like that.

"In reality, there is nothing more damaging to the adventorous spirit within a man than a secure future....The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun." -Alex Supertramp

Just thought I'd share one man's story that has truly inspired me to find a new and different sun every day!

Here's another bracelet pattern! I tried to make it more masculine for all the fellas out there :) email lydia.braceletsforchange@gmail.com to get yours!

People ask me what college I'm going to after high school.
They don't ask me what I want to do with my life.
They ask what college.
It's as if college is the object, not the life to be lived after it.
I don't understand.

People ask why I'm not just going for an art major.
As if that wouldn't be the easy thing.
They try and get their ideas for me in.
Make the things I'm considering seem less suitable.
This life has been given to me, not to them.
Lord love them,
He knows I do.
It's just hard to deal with people's assumptions for me when I'm dealing with 750 other things. Most unpleasant.

I want to go on a week long canoe trip.
I want to jump on a trampoline.
I want to swim the English channel, climb Mt. Everest, write a book.
I want to rescue little Albanian boys and girls from terrible, lifelong sex slavery.
I want to skinny dip in the Pacific, and splatter paint a house.
I long to take the hippie trail. From Europe to India;
From India to Nepal,
Back to Europe.

Even though I long to be free of the constraints put upon me by others,
by society in general,
I've gotta chill out.
I must breathe in.
And then out.
Drive the car a little bit to fast
with the music to loud.
Waiting on time
To carry me to freedom.
This is my life.
Now is the most important moment.
I don't want to waste it.





Lydia


Like a south bound train
Here's a song for leavin.
Don't you know that pain,
It's a part of the healin.