It's Thanksgiving week so me and my baby sister have had more time to hang out! We made this picture out of melted crayons yesterday, and managed to shut the power down for a minute (apparently 2 is too many blow dryers going at once;))! It's not the most beautiful thing that I have made, but we spent time together and that's what matters.

I <3 you, baby sis.

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. ~The Apostle Paul

Paul wrote this in a letter after telling the church in Corinth (Greece) that he had been struggling with a vice and had asked God three times to remove it (apparently, saying something 3 times in Greek is like shouting or writing it in italics). It was something terrible, perhaps physical, perhaps emotional. Whatever it was, Paul struggled with it for a long time, and he hated it, but through this he learned how to trust God more, as the passage above implies.
Now, I am not trying to make Paul's thorn seem less important or serious by comparing it to mine, but I am struggling with something hard now too. I REALLY doubt that it is worse or as bad as his was, but that does not mean it is easier to deal with. It's making everyday life more complicated, it's testing my patience and endurance, and it's making me question my dreams, and future plans. I have always thought that dreams are good things-they are gifts from God. Most of my dreams require the action that this thorn is taking away from me: to walk the hippy trail, to hitch hike across the U.S.A. with a true friend (sappy, I know, but a dream's a dream), to rescue Sudanese children from captivity. Is this thorn God's way of showing me that these are not the dreams He wants me to chase? Or is He just telling me to be patient, to bear the pain silently, and to look towards brighter tomorrows with fresh hope? He hasn't told me what it is yet. I do know, however, that His mercies are new every morning. I know that this pain is only temporary,and that though I may be weak physically, I can be strong spiritually.




Lydia

I'm at a stage in my life where all it seems I'm doing is figuring out stuff. I'm figuring out where I'm going to attend college in the fall. I'm trying to find scholarships so I can somehow afford school.

Honestly, it stresses me out. I'm so overwhelmed my it all. There are so many different sites to look at and so many things to fill out and try to write. I'm stuck in this stage where I'm paralyzed by all of this. I'm so scared that I won't get in where I want to go, and even if I do, that I won't be able to go there because I can't pay for it. Really, I think the later option is what scares me the most. I'm terrified of being stuck here. No, it's not like I hate where I am...I don't exactly. I just can not be here next year. The closest of my friends, the ones who share in my hearts desires and life goals, etc., they won't be here. I can not be here without them.

The three of us support one another while we're here. None of us want to stay here, and all of us share in the desire to serve somewhere in this world...mostly out of the states. Since we all have this singular desire, we all hold one another up.

This is partially why I don't want to be here. The closest of my friends are going to be out, doing something else, something they want and desire while I am stuck...stuck in the mundane in a place I have grown tired of. I know that sounds harsh...when I've tried to explain it before, I've gotten shocked expressions. I don't know how to put what I'm feeling in less-harsh words.

I just remain waiting on my Savior. Waiting to see where He will take all of this. I know it's all in His hands, and I need to rest in that. It's hard and I really struggle with that concept sometimes, but that's also just me needing to rely on Christ even more.

I am daily needing more and more of Christ. Nothing I do ever is enough. Praise God for His grace being more than enough.


Brianna

My parents paid for a photographer that we know to take my senior pictues a couple weeks ago. She did a great job. This one is my favorite because I love my worn out shoes .

I have an issue with keeping shoes forever. I don't want to let them go, I want to wear them until they disintegrate. Let me tell you why.

1) I don't want to waste. If the shoe fits-why buy another pair?

2) I can be picky about shoes and sometimes have trouble finding replacements that I like.

3) I love love love having shoes that tell my story. I love dirt and grime, and getting all messed up so that I can be cleaned again. I like seeing the threads in my shoes because, to me, that says "you've done something, Lydia. you've been places. you've worked hard." And in the end, that's what I want my life to say.

Walk on, Little Darling.

Your tears run down my shoulder.

It breaks my heart

Over and over.

I hate seeing you like this,

Knowing that it only gets harder.

You didn't know that all the bad in the world is so painful;

Adults do such a good job of hiding it.

It's not fair that no one warned you

It's not fair that that would not have helped.

Your tears fall onto my shoulder

My sweatshirt soaks them up.

I am watching you discover all the things that tore me up.

Not long ago, I was you.

I was the one with the tears in my eyes,

With my heart being split in two by a new,

A cruel feeling.

Death, pain, grief, turmoil,

It all paralyzes you.

Paralyzes your emotions,

Paralyzes your thoughts.

You have to go on.

You have to look up.

I am here for you forever

But I cannot take it all away.

Face the world with a rainbow in your heart.

Walk on, battered but not diminished.

Little darling, life is going to scar you.

It has distressed my body and soul in the same way.

Every one is going to hurt you,

Like Bob warns us,

You just have to decide who is worth it.

You're worth it to me

So tell me what you need to,

Keep hidden what you don't.

I am not looking for a good story.

I don't want to be in the middle of things.

Tell me when you need me

And I will be gone when you don't.

I will let you down

But in your heart you know that He won't.

So walk on, Little Darling.

Walk with your heart in His hands

And thrive.

Sure, we are young.
Yes, there are things we do not know or understand.
Of course life is going to be hard.
That does not give anyone a right to tell us we can't, to say that we must do a certain something.
Our lives are just that: our lives.
We have a right to make our own mistakes.
How will we learn if we never live?
Independence is hard, but it's something we all have a right to pursue.
Why do youcomplain as if life is a punishment?
Why do you act like you had nothing to do with making your life what it is?
I see, I know, I can tell.
Your decisions decide your destiny.
Maybe even your happiness.
Do not try and re-write your story through me.
Stifling us will not give you a second chance.
Only you can do that.

It's time for change; why shouldn't we want it?




Lydia

These are my new coloured pencils! I am so blessed to have the money to buy them for my own use. I'm working on a drawing for my Grandma's Christmas present! Shhhhh