Empty.

You lay there, covered by a blanket of fresh air, relishing the perfect grass against your skin. There is blue and there is green and there is gold. You have all you need because the rays of the sun quench your thirst and you feed off of happiness. You find contentment in the sun on closed eyelids. The rest of your body is alternately illuminated by and shaded from the sun which passes through clouds. You do not fear, you do not hate, you do not regret. That feeling of remorse over hurtful or embarassing moments is gone. You aren't uncomfortable, you aren't threatened. You do not feel like a stumbling soul lost in a world of other, more perfect beings. Perfection has been achieved by the wind tossing your hair with it's crystal fingers. Never have you lied, never have you fallen. Never have you changed, never have you been taught a lesson. Never have you been hurt. All is perfection until your mind starts to peel free and you see that neither have you laughed, neither have you cried, neither have you felt love for another. You have yet to fall and get back up, you have never tried and you have never failed. Never have you put aside all weighty doubts and exchanged them for life. Never have you lived. Lived like you only get one life and being overtaken by ignorant bliss in a field of joy is one way to waste such a gift. So you get up. And you go. And you laugh and you cry and you see pain and you wait for healing. And you bless and you regret and you fall and you get back up. And you believe and you love and you live.

Lydia

Everything is different.

What if it wasn't the sea, it was the sky? Imagine the sun being beneath us. Picture a mountain turned upside down. Feel the wind rush by in a valley, the river rush by in the sky. Imagine that it isn't books, it's memory. What if laying down brought one closer to the moon? Picture standing on your hands in the sky. Visualize falling through time. Pretend it's not Mac, it's PC. Believe that there are pots of gold in the sky. Don't doubt that tears are diamonds. What if words were pictures and pictures were words? What if nature was an oil painting? Think of unicorns being at the zoo and horses as mythical beings. Imagine that the beach is the sea and the sea is made of sand. Picture yourself surrounded by glass in a canyon, hearing your favorite song. What if water was purple and the sun glowed green in the sky? Imagine everything turned all around and yourself somewhere completely different.

Lydia

To Save a Life

What does that mean? Or how about-What does it mean to you?

Last night I went and saw the movie (To Save a Life) and while I don't think it's appropriate for a young young kid, I loved it. I learned from it, and I felt the pain that a couple of the characters go through.

The movie addresses one overarching problem (with other issues thrown in): "Am I so unwanted, so insignificant, that if I were to rid the world of myself, would anyone care...or really, would anyone even notice? Does anyone love me enough to care if I'm gone?"

This movie hurt. It hurt to watch. It hurt so much because I know that it is so real, so signifiant in the lives across this Earth. People feel unloved...they feel worthless and while suicide solves nothing it is so common today because that is all some people feel they can do. I have hurt...and I have hurt tremendously. I have seen hurt. But never have I experienced or seen the kind of hurt that would ever drive someone to taking their own life.

What hurts me the most is knowing that quite often we could do something to help that person, to show them they are loved, to show them they have worth, and to help them realize their life matters. I can tell you that from my own experience in the past that simply loving on someone is the best thing a person can get. When I am so upset, so down, having someone who even just barely knows me asks me how I am, even smiles at me-that means the world to me. If it means that much to me, imagine how it must make someone dealing with thoughts of suicide feel. It may seem insignificant but it really could be what someone needs.

Why is it that even as a Christian, someone who is commanded to love - can't even love what society considers the losers or the unloveables? I know I can never love someone exactly like Christ loves me or the fellow sinner...but I can try. I can love that person as best as I can. Even when that person is someone who I don't really care for, I should still love them even though it is difficult for me.

I just pray that the people who are hard for me to love, the people who are often overlooked, would become loved by me. I pray that I can overcome this pride in my heart to love those considered "beneath" me.

Brianna

"Have you ever noticed that idiots have a lot of friends? Just an observation."

-I Am the Messenger
by Markus Zusak

Although I don't recommend this book in the least (I stopped reading it because I got bored), I find this character's observation amusing. Why do idiots have all the friends? You know the less-than-intellectual-people that other people love being around? Why do people love being around them? Even when these "idiots" are not good looking, and do not have all the money, they manage to attract others to them. Funny. We use the term idiot in a derogatory way but often flock to those that fit the description. It just doesn't make sense. Are the people who get a laugh out of their ignorance idiots? Or is it the people who are ignorant but pretend that they know a whole lot the real idiots? Or are we all idiots? This seems like the most reasonable answer. None of us knows everything, therefore we are all ignorant of something, therefore we are all idiots to some degree. So maybe what makes an idiot an idiot is how much they don't know. Maybe that is what puts us on different levels. Maybe what attracts those of us who aren't the kind of idiot that has all the friends to one another is our common lack of knowledge (our above-average idiot level) or our common knowledge (our mediocre idiot level). Or maybe, just maybe, it's our actual knowledge that attracts us to each other and the only reason we often seek the company of idiots is because we don't really want to know anything. Perhaps we seek to lower ourselves to a level below our personal, mental scope. Then again it could just be that we want to have fun and, in the end, idiots have all the fun.

Lydia

All that can be said after a hard day; the conclusion reached during a lull in conflict.

Of LOST.



ABC' s LOST is a great show, but contrary to popular belief, I think that it has headed progressively downhill since mid third season.
The first and second seasons were about crazy developments and past happenings that kept us guessing and confused but always came down to one familiar truth. The truth that no matter what a person goes through, no matter who they are, no matter what they have, the most important things in life are the relationships. It all comes down to who you love and who you hate.
Just a few episodes into the first season relationships were already developing: Jack bonded with Kate, Rose pined for Bernard, Charlie took responsibility for Claire, Sayid and Sawyer clashed. These are the characters whose relationships we have cried over, followed, regretted. All the LOST characters have been subjected to intense physical trials but those struggles are not the ones we remember. We remember the birth of Aaron, Locke's care for Boone, the death of Charlie, and the change that comes about in Sun and Jin's marriage. These people and the way they related to one another was what kept the show simple and grounded. They reacted and behaved the way we can assume real individuals would. What has become of the show?
LOST is now about events spinning out of control and out of time. The character development has been bypassed by three or four complex storylines progressing through each episode. The writers seem to have changed the focus from the importance of others, to all things supernatural and mind-boggling. It's still a good show, I don't think anyone is able to guess what is going to happen, but it has gotten so wrapped up in feuds between virtually unknown characters and other-worldly activity that the familiar truth it used to portray so stoically has been misplaced.
It's just a show, but has something great been turned into something average? With Hurley as our constant and evil as our nemesis, I believe we can safely assume that LOST will be finished on a good note, though maybe not on the show's highest.

Lydia

when all other lights go out.